Have you seen a stranger page 3 in a political party’s policy document?

Reading Conservative policy documents seems to be getting a bit of a hobby of mine. It certainly has its highlights (such as the bit calling for a policy that, er…, is already happening, the spectacularly ill-timed mortgage policy, the lopsided priorities for tax cuts, the policy that ends up requiring MPs to be opted out of the Freedom of Information Act after all, the ten years out of date figures and the impressive ability to point four different ways on the same policy point).

And now I can unveil … the strange case of page three.

It’s in Inspiring British Teenagers, which, as Benedict Brogan points out, rather worries about British children being too bookish. I’m sure that’s what pensioners think all the time when they see hoodies: “Crikey, that young so-and-so looks like he spends too much time reading books and now I’m really scared he’s going to mug me.”

But that’s page sixteen. Page three is the one for me. Why? Well, it’s rather odd. You see, when a political party launches a policy document the normal form is to go to great lengths to emphasise how it is new – as that’s what makes it newsworthy. You’re not going to get much coverage if you launch a document saying, “hey, this is just boring old rehashed stuff from last time”.

Yet page three goes to great lengths to emphasise how the policy isn’t new, quoting instead four speeches from the last two years, headlining them “An idea 2 years in the making…” just to make the point.

It’s almost as if someone thought, “Oh dear. Conservatives launching a policy document talking about bringing back a form of national service is going to sound like a panicked lurch to the right and return to core votes strategy, so we had better try really hard to make it sound like it’s just old hat.”

Of course, there’s no way that would be the case is it?